The Best Thing I Ever Ate

Yesterday was a busy day. Early face-to-face meetings that lasted longer than anticipated which merged into lunch meetings, and then became dinner meetings. I know my mantra is "no excuses" but that is tertiary to my other two mantras: "don't get fired" and "don't tick off your wife". I could absolutely have snuck in a quick workout, and neglected all the familial responsibilities for the day, but I absolutely didn't want to do that, so I spent what little of a hole I had in my day taking care of my baby.

Besides, my calves were way too fried to consider any sort of workout. I could have done a pure upper body weights day at the gym, and considered doing that, but in the end giving my muscles and back an extra day off will probably be good for me.

As for those calves, yeah, they're not good. I am walking like a penguin in an effort to use them as infrequently as possible, mostly because they seem to be frozen solid. No running today, and I can't even swim with them so wrecked, so it looks like a little boxing is on tap later today. I'll do something to loosen them up tomorrow, however painful it may be.

Last night for dinner I ate probably the best thing I've ever eaten: the signature pork chop from Perry's Steakhouse. Oh, my. They bring it out to the table and carve it for you, because it is about 5-6 inches thick, literally. They carved it into three sections: the ribs, the excellent bit, and the mindblowingly phenomenal bit. I have no idea how they got a lean loin cut to be fall off the bone fork cut tender, and I also have no idea what they did to put that insanely flavorful crust on the outside. All I know is that I was transformed to another world by eating this thing.

Pork chops actually have a good protein-to-fat ratio in them, and aren't highly caloric. I ate about half of it, bravely suppressing my canine instincts to eat the whole thing, and brought the rest home to my wife (who was having a late dinner). She was skeptical that I was being hyperbolic about the greatness of the chop until she ate it, and she became a believer. All in all, I think my segment was in the 500 calorie range, which was pretty good discipline in the out-to-eat-at-a-steakhouse business dinner.

Smoked Calves

Tonight I had business colleagues from the Northeast in town, so of course they wanted good Texas BBQ, and can you blame them? For my money, there is no better dinner than a big plate of smoked beef, especially if it is completely unavailable in your home town with any sort of quality. We went downtown to the Iron Works, a BBQ joint I haven't tried yet which is extremely casual and very highly rated. It did not disappoint in any way.

I'm not exactly sure the caloric content on BBQ - the long low and slow cooking process is designed to render the fat down in not-so-lean cuts of meat to the point where it melts and lubricates the meat to deliciousness. So some of it melts away, and some of it doesn't. I'm pretty sure I exceeded my 700 calorie target even by avoiding the potato salad, but again I'm more than okay doing that on occasions. I got a nice plate of sausage, beef rib, and brisket that wasn't too much food (in the old days I would have got another plate to fully satisfy myself), and left feeling okay.

Dinner ended early and on the way home I felt like Tiger Woods alone in Las Vegas. Do I call up the boys and go to Pluckers for some wings and beer? Call up other friends and go to Z Tejas for margaritas? Hey, the Hot Doughnut sign is on at Krispy Kreme! Ooo, there's a Baskin Robbins right here I can just duck into. But bravely I resisted temptation and got home early.

Prior to dinner I went on my 5 mile run circuit. My brother in law sent me a video that showed proper running technique, which I had watched and studied, and realized that I was running in bad form as well as swimming in bad form. Who knew? So I adopted the new technique and went for a run.

It felt a little weird to start, but once I got the hang of it it felt pretty good. Going uphill especially was much better and smoother, and my times over the first 2.7 miles were really fast. I was going uphill fast, and non-laboriously, which was awesome. But I noticed around mile 1.5 that my calves were starting to stiffen up, and by the time I reached 2.7 (or the start of the time that really sucks) my calves were done. I plodded on, finished the run in 54 minutes, but I've been walking funny ever since.

There are a number of theories as to what happened. I'll list them in order of likeliness:
1) My calves are weak and out of shape, and the added work was way too much for them. This is obviously the most logical theory for reasons I don't need to explain - it would be like explaining why it gets warmer when the sun comes up.
2) I was doing it wrong. The theory behind the technique is to run more on the balls of the feet, which absorbs shock better, and keeps my stride in check so I don't overstride. If I overdid it by going too far forward on my toes, I could put undue strain on my calves. Also if I continued to overstride I would likely do the same. Being not what you would call a "natural athlete" I can easily see myself screwing it up.
3) The technique is bad and I should return to the old heel-toe. This is what my wife told me, and she's an avid runner. I'm willing to work with it for some time, because worst case is I get a great calf workout, and knowing (1) is true, who cares if it is wrong as long as I'm getting stronger. But the science makes sense, and my brother in law knows what he's talking about, so I'll give it time to make it work.

We'll see how this goes.

Victory at Sea

Not so long ago just after I first started this program, a friend wagered that I would not be able to lose 15 pounds faster than him. He had every right to make this bet, as my history of being unable to stick to a diet and exercise regiment, along with my gluttony, was well documented. He figured at best he wouldn't lose, and could only win, save me accidentally losing a limb or something.

Little did he know I was already inspired. As I mentioned in my first post, my earlier problems were I relied less on math and more on something akin to voodoo to lose weight. Shockingly, that wasn't effective. Once I figured out mathematically what was wrong, it was over before it started.

I took his bet and then offered it to another friend locally, who also banked on my failure and took the bet. Both bets were made when I was 240 pounds, and with my program I figured I'd lose a pound every 3 days and be done in 45 days.

33 days later, which was today, I had dropped the 15 pounds. Somehow I was able to burn 50% more calories per day than the 1,200 deficit I had planned. Still not sure if I was eating less or getting more exercise than planned, but who cares, it all worked.

Before I started the program I was 26% body fat at 242.4 pounds. Today at 224.0 pounds I'm 21% body fat and I've lost 6 inches off my gut. All in about 40 days so far. My goal weight is 215-220, and then I'm going to up the calories and keep up the exercise to turn the fat into muscle. Visible results will be slower then, but I'll be healthier and build strength and stamina better as I'll have good fuel in me, which will be good.

So how did it happen today? I was going to run but it was raining, so I decided to go to the gym and swim. After my off day, I always weigh in good, and today was no exception - I got on the scale and saw 225.4, which was lower than I expected. I knew then I wasn't going to leave there until I was under 225.

Off to the pool and I noticed a guy that I call "the Terminator" was in the lane next to me. Different from Speedo Guy, the Terminator doesn't appear to be in great shape, but he crushes laps at an incredible pace and never takes a break. He just keeps going and going, and it is pretty humbling to swim next to the guy. So he's there and he's crushing me, when one of the lifeguards comes over to me and offers me advice on my stroke. Sure enough as I had thought earlier, there was something wrong with my stroke, and in about a minute he showed me what it was and I was back in action. My brother-in-law tried to correct this earlier in the summer, but I never figured out what he was trying to tell me until today (I need to be a better listener - no smart alecky comments appreciated on this point please). With my new stroke, I was more effective and a faster swimmer, if occasionally struggling with the whole "not drowning" thing. I was actually able to keep pace with the Terminator, which was a good feeling (I have better turns than him, he was better on the straightaways).

I did my usual 2x3x10 workout of free and breaststroke, and my new stroke made me work a little harder so I got a better workout. When I got out I wondered if I had done enough to burn the .4 pounds, and saw that I burned 1.4 pounds. Awesome. Yeah, I know I'm not *really* 224 pounds because I was down water weight after the workout, but I hit it on the scale and dang it that's good enough for me.

Dinner tonight was Thai flavored stir fry. I found some jarred kaffir lime leaves and Thai basil which I've been itching to try. Recipe as follows:

2 boneless skinless chicken breasts (440 calories)
1 tbsp sesame oil (120 calories)
1 tbsp minced garlic
2 green onions, sliced thin on a bias
1 tbsp minced ginger
1 small stalk lemongrass, minced fine
2 plantains, cut into thin chips on a bias (440 calories)
2 large carrots, peeled and sliced on bias (60 calories)
2 cups snow peas (80 calories)
1/4 cup stock
1/4 cup light coconut milk (35 calories)
1 tbsp soy sauce
1 tbsp kaffir lime leaves
1 tbsp minced Thai basil
juice of 1 lime
1-whatever you dare tbsp Schriacha

Brown chicken in oil. Once fully cooked on outside, add lemongrass, garlic, carrots, and ginger, and cook until garlic starts to brown slightly. Add plantains and toss, and then add all the other ingredients, save the snow peas. Cook until plantains are almost soft (taste test) and tender, and add snow peas. Cook for an additional 5, adding more liquid if needed. 550 calories per serving.

Windows is a horrible and unstable operating system

I was going to blog tonight. In fact, I blogged for about 20 minutes in front of the TV before my Windows laptop decided to eat my effort again. Did I learn from the last time? No. I tried to simplify the task - just blog, open another tab to get the caloric content of food right. That's it. No pictures, no multiple tabs, no unknown websites. Nothing. And what happens? Lockup and crash. It's my work laptop, so it relatively current on patches, etc. so why does it crash? Because Windows is horrible, that's why.

If you are ever faced with the option, and you don't buy a Mac over a PC, you've made a horrific, regrettable, and awful consumer choice. Plain and simple. No way to sugar coat that.

So no blog tonight. Not at all motivated to recreate that. Maybe tomorrow.

I hate Windows...

Blueberry Pancakes: Does a body good.

Saturday is my day to beat myself up at the gym. With nothing on the schedule for the morning, I could devote all the time I wanted to punishing myself, and I took advantage of it to be sure.

A lot of times during my Saturday self-flagellation, I find myself enervated (due to the fact that I'm slowly starving myself to life). I decided this morning to make sure I had the right amount of fuel, and not be as calorie-conscious at breakfast. That meant a giant batch of the most perfect food ever created was on tap: blueberry pancakes.

Sure, some people may say bacon is the most perfect food ever created, and they're right. And maybe the Luther burger is the most perfect meal ever created. But if you're not being completely obscene, is there anything that makes you feel more righteous than a big stack of blueberry pancakes? I don't think so.

Granted, I didn't go overboard and make myself a stack of about 8 like I wanted to. My breakfast was probably in the 600-700 calorie range, which is entirely reasonable for a big land animal of my size. Given an hour to digest and I was ready to crush it at the gym.

The most remarkable thing about my workout was getting on the elliptical, which I don't hate (unlike the evil Stairmaster). After an hour of weights and abs, I hopped on the elliptical expecting it to suck, and expecting the usual 5-10 minutes of pain before I settled into it. Strangely, it was rather pleasant right off the bat. Not sitting-on-a-private-beach-and-drinking-pina-coladas-next-to-my-wife pleasant, granted, but a decidedly absence-of-suck pleasant. After 20 minutes I found I needed to increase my pace in order to get the exercise I wanted, and I was burning hard for the last five minutes. It was pretty cool to be that strong throughout. War blueberry pancakes!

We later met a friend downtown at the giant Whole Foods which gave me an opportunity to shop there. Found all kinds of awesomeness there, which I then turned into dinner. Whole branzino, which are European sea bass, some interesting french horn mushrooms (which were better looking than tasting, sadly), and some huge cipolini onions were among my finds.

I took the mushrooms and sliced them lengthwise to preserve the shape, and laid them on a cookie sheet. I then diced two of the cipolini and 8 kalamata olives, peeled two bunches of globe carrots, and then coated them all in a tablespoon of oil, salt, and pepper. I put the oil on the onions and carrots as the mushrooms would absorb it and require more oil. I topped the mushrooms with the other stuff, and put a little stock on the bottom of the pan. Roasted in the oven for 20 minutes or until the carrots were tender. About 200 calories per serving, give or take, which I tossed with some pasta (200 more calories per serving) for a healthy side dish.

I took the branzino and scored each side on a bias, and put onto a sheet of parchment on a cookie sheet. I then diced half a cipolini, 8 more kalamata olives, a handful of Italian parsley, and 1/8 cup roasted tomatoes, and a diced serrano pepper, all of which I tossed in a tablespoon of oil and salt and pepper. I then rubbed the mix on the fish, into the slits and cavity especially, and then put a small pool of stock on the bottom and sealed up the parchment by working my way around the edges until it was completely pinched shut. Roast at 350 for 15 minutes and it is perfect. About 270-300 calories per serving.

Egyptology

I tried to get this out twice last night, and twice my browser crashed destroying all my work. Teaches me to use the Windows laptop instead of the Mac. Pro tip: go buy a Mac.

On Thursday's run I got a weird feeling in my gut. Not the euphemistic weird feeling of impending doom, but a genuinely strange feeling right in the flabby part of my gut. As it wasn't anything serious, I will now offer conjecture as to what it was.

Tutankhamun's tomb was meticulously and painstakingly built, and packed with treasures from the day. After his burial in the tomb, I'm sure people knew where it was, and it was heavily guarded to protect the treasures. Then Egypt fell, and the tomb became lost to the ages, buried deep in the desert sands.

3000 years or so later Howard Carter stumbled upon the tomb. I'm sure excavation of the tomb was difficult as 3000 years of sand needed to be moved, and 3000 years didn't exactly make any of the entrances easier to penetrate. Plus, it is a little spooky opening those things. Certainly not easy by any means.

This is what I imagined was happening to my gut. Fat treasures stored decades ago are now being recalled, and my body has to open all the rusty doors to them long since considered permanently closed. My body has to re-learn where it hid all that fat, like derelict squirrels finding their nuts from the fall.

I took it as a good sign.

Last night for dinner I played with my Indian spices. Sadly, I was out of fresh curry leaves and had to make do with the powder. Recipe approximation is as follows:

Cardimom Quinoa
1/2 cup quinoa (310 calories)
1 cup stock
1 tbsp chili paste
1/2 tbsp sessame oil (60 calories)
1/2 tbsp toasted sesame oil (60 calories)
1 tsp ginger
1/2 tsp ground cardimom

toast the quinoa lightly in the oil, add everything else, mix thoroughly and let simmer on low until done, half an hour or so. 220 or so calories per serving, serves 2

Kale "Paneer"
A healthy take on Saag Paneer, using kale instead of spinach or mustard greens.

2 cups dinosaur kale (1 bunch), cut into ribbons (70 calories)
1/2 tbsp sessame oil (60 calories)
1/2 tbsp toasted sesame oil (60 calories)
1/4 cup stock/water
1 tsp ground ginger
1 tbsp minced garlic
1 5.3oz container plain non-fat greek yogurt (80 calories)
dash soy sauce
2 tsp curry powder

Lightly sautee the garlic and ginger in the oil on med-high heat, and then add the kale before anything burns. Toss to coat and then add liquid, cook uncovered until most of the liquid is reduced. Add the yogurt to the pan with soy sauce and curry. A good Greek yogurt will curdle almost immediately, leaving curds of "paneer". Drain off the liquid once fully curdled. 135 calories per serving, serves 2.

Chicken with Mint and Garlic

A mint and garlic rub makes a great coating for chicken, and adding a touch of curry leaves a very nice Indian-style taste.

2 boneless skinless chicken breasts (about 220 calories each for half pound breasts)
2 tbsp minced mint
2 tbsp minced garlic
1/2 tbsp sesame oil (60 calories) - can omit if you grill
1 tsp crushed red pepper (optional for added heat)
2 tsp curry powder
salt to taste

Heat oil in non-stick pan. Rub the chicken breasts with all the spices and pan sear (not too hot - don't want the mint to burn) or grill until done. 220-250 calories per serving, serves 2.

5.0, Heroics, and Chili

5.0 was the maximum GPA where I went to school. Kids who would later be known as "successful" achieved GPAs at or near that number, where my GPA was more in the "you want fries with that" range.

I've marked off a number of loops that I run on a consistent basis, one is the 5.0 miler I ran today. The loop starts out innocently enough, with moderate uphills and downhills until I get to mile 2, where I get an awesome 7/10ths of a mile downhill run that makes me feel really fast. Right at that point, which is coincidentally a friend's house, is the time where the run really sucks. I have cleverly named that portion of the run "the time that really sucks" because it is a straight uphill run for at least .8 - 1.0 miles. Brutal.

Today felt good, partially because the sun returned and it was a nice 60 degrees. I worked through lunch, so I made time later in the day, which was awesome because school was getting out then. Which meant there were crossing guards to help the kids cross the street. And these crossing guards for some reason stop traffic so I can get by too. Gave me a feeling of power, kind of. And yeah, the drivers probably got upset at being stopped so my fat slow behind could waddle past, but I'm just doing something our government will never do, namely reducing future healthcare costs, so they should appreciate my efforts.

While running, I figured out a new purpose for this blog: to become a hero. Work with me here for a second. If you save someone's life, you're a hero, right? You give them up to 75 years of life with your heroic actions. While I'm not saving lives, if I inspire 75 people to get in shape and eat better, and each person lives one more year as a result, isn't that the same as giving one person 75 years? I've already heard from at least 5 people I've inspired, so only 70 to go and I'm a certified hero. I'm pretty sure it works like that.

For dinner tonight, I made chili. There are ways to make "chili" with healthy substitutes like turkey, and some of those recipes are pretty good. But I wanted to make real chili, and find a way to make it lighter without sacrificing flavor, and still satisfying. So off I went, and here it is.

Chili:
2-3 pound beef shoulder chuck roast (880 calories per pound net)
1 butternut squash (64 calories per cup, usually yields 4)
2 cans red kidney beans (700 calories)
1 28oz can pureed tomatoes (300 calories)
2 tbsp molasses (120 calories)
1 dark beer (150 calories)
1 large onion (60 calories)
1 tbsp olive oil (120 calories)
2 tbsp minced garlic
good amounts of chili powder and cumin, to taste, with salt & pepper
half can of pureed ancho chile in adobo
2 large jalapenos
1 square dark chocolate (70% or greater) (50 calories)

Cube the meat and be sure to eliminate all the obvious fat (I lost a full third of my roast to fat I threw out). Brown in oil in heavy dutch oven, and then add onions and garlic, and fry until soft. Add tomatoes and beer, and water or stock to cover, plus as much chili powder and cumin as you dare. Let boil on low, covered, for about 2 hours, stirring occasionally to deter sticking. Add more liquid as needed, with molasses, finely diced jalapenos, and more spice (yes, you need to keep adding it to build flavor). Let cook for another hour and add chocolate, ancho, and more spice, stirring them in, and then diced squash and liquid as needed, let cook for half an hour and add the beans (no liquid) and finish for 10 minutes. About 3200 calories for the pot, serving 5-6 600 calorie bowls. Serve with a spinach salad, 100 calories if you get crazy with it, for a balanced meal.